The life and times of the Redding family.

Sunday, January 08, 2006

Mothering

I realize the last few years that my attitudes are changing about mothering. I am the motherly type and it is a good thing considering the family the Lord has blessed me with. But now I find myself feeling motherly toward young mothers. This happened even before I had my last child at 43 and even before I became a mother in law and a grand mother. I think it came with the 40's.

I feel really sorry for the moms who are so afraid of their young children that they cannot be an authority in their lives. Not physically afraid, of course. Yet still afraid.....Afraid that their children will not like them. Children, who do not have parents who are willing to be an authority figure in their lives, feel insecure and have a harder life. I truly believe this. They do not have the capacity to be in charge of themselves or to make decisions for themselves. They have very little life experience to base their decisions on. They also do not have the capacity to know the depth of love you as a parent have for them. They do not have the capacity to reason things out. That is why they have parents. God designed families to care for children (emotionally, physically, spiritually) and to teach them right from wrong and the way to live and work with others. We have a job to do. Our children will not always appreciate it, understand it or like us. This does not change our job.

I also have one more thing to say about this. Our goal is to rear children who are not self focused but God focused. If we discipline our children and teach them to discipline themselves they will be welcomed anywhere. People will respond to them in positive ways which will only build their self esteem.

P.S. I hope it is obvious that I am talking about young children. As they grow up and turn their lives over to God they will make more and more of their own decisions. By the time they are young adults they should have a strong foundation and should be able to prayerfully and wisely make their own decisions.

3 comments:

tootlepip said...

Great post! Glad to see you sharing.

Tootles

Reddingmountain said...

I'm trying! It is really hard for me to put my words down.

Charlie Tee said...

I am glad that my daughter is not afraid of her children.My son on the other hand must learn this lesson, he is a good Father, but I feel as though he has let his life spin somewhat out of control, and now it's cost him his marriage,and his life with my grandson.Mother and son are moving out of state.
Please keep your network of prayers aimed his way...despite it all he is a good man, and I hurt for him.
lovingly,Charlie Tee